NYC's "Go-Bag" Is Insane
Do they even know what real survival entails?
New York City (NYC) have recently published “advice” suggesting that New Yorkers create a “Go Bag”. Imaged suggestions for the post-nuclear “Go Bag” include… a teddy bear and a Nintendo Switch. Oh, and also a Gameboy that hasn’t been seen since the 1980s.
The image was depicted in the NYC’s Emergency Management tweet:
We’re pretty sure whoever made the image just literally slapped together a random bunch of s**t… the rubber ducky in the top-right isn’t selling it to us (if you’re fleeing the house, when are you going to have time for a bath?), nor is the carpet rug in the bottom left.
That, and the hilariously misshappen bags and differing - likely stolen - art styles. The pixel art Nintendo Switch, the Clipart style rug, the early 2000s cel-shaded controllers.
This is supposed to be high quality survival advice, not a 5-minute slap-together image.
They appear to have removed any mention of the toys from their published advice, but on another page (under ‘Gather Supplies’) it mentions packing toys for small children:
The Image Has Nothing To Do With The Advice… Or Why It Is Insane
You’d be forgiven if you thought we meant the image was insane. It is clearly crazy, but the go-bag advice, like their advice for dealing with nuclear fallout, is utterly terrible.
The worst part is, it’s insane because the advice seems legitimate, but for a post-nuclear scenario it is completely and utterly insane. We’ll be working through the list found on here and issuing a rebuttal.
The Rebuttal
Use a backpack or something sturdy
Completely glosses over, and oversimplifies the issue. You shouldn’t use any old backpack or “something sturdy” (whatever that is). If you are going to be carrying a bag of weighted, heavy supplies, you want something with both a decent carrying capacity, and, given it may be on your back as you walk many hundreds of miles, be comfortable to wear when fully laden.
We assumg they mean a briefcase or suitcase for the “something sturdy”, but the uneven weight distribution will kill your shoulders and injure your back. Terrible advice!
Copy important documents — insurance cards, birth certificates, deeds, photo IDs, proof of address — and keep them in a waterproof zipper bag
Utterly pointless waste of time. In a post-nuke scenario, there isn’t going to be a functioning government left to check your “birth certificates” or “deeds” (assuming you even still have a house).
Insurance firms rarely pay out in ‘force majeure’ (‘Act of God’) situations, of which if you carefully check the wording of your insurance contract, you will likely find things like ‘bioterrorism’ and ‘nuclear war’ as exempt. That is, of course, assuming the firm even exists post-nuke to issue insurance.
Extra set of house and car keys
EMP would wreck the car, and the house would either be destroyed or irradiated. You wouldn’t want to return. Think Chernobyl. Pointless.
Copies of ATM/credit cards
EMP would fry the cards and the ATMs. Also, society just collapsed in a nuclear war, who the hell do you think would be accepting cards?
Cash (in small bills!)
Yes and no. People might still accept cash post-nuke - assuming the economy didn’t collapse immediately after the fireball - but you’ll likely find there’s no-one around to accept it. If you want to hedge bets and avoid a cash crash - get some silver and gold.
This next one is split into two.
Bottled water […]
Wrong. Water is weight. When travelling long distances you want to keep weight to a minimum. Carrying enough water for 3 days (their own suggestion) would be 6 litres of water (2 litres a day assuming normal consumption rates). It is too heavy for a typical person to carry with all the additional weight too.
Get a portable, compact water filter instead, and learn how to use and maintain it.
This has many advantages: you’re not carrying excess weight in water, you can filter less-ideal water (warning: most filters are not rated to deal with radioactive contamination), and you can produce more than 3 days worth of water. Some filters, if well kept, can last for many years.
[…] and energy bars
Wrong. Energy bars are not designed for survival situations, they’re designed as a breakfast or a snack. They have poor nutritional content. In a survival situation it isn’t just energy - you need nutritents. Things like vitamins, electrolytes, micro-nutritents (copper, iodine).
You need two things: rations [either lifeboat rations (doesn’t require cooking) or military style rations (may require cooking)] and A-Z multivitamin tablets.
Rations are designed, intentionally to be both energy dense (so a small lifeboat ration will give you enough calories for an entire day, like 3 meals in one bar) and nutritionally sufficient (sufficient meaning it meets your basic requirements to survive short-term).
A-Z multivitamins pick up the slack on what the rations miss. In our humble, non-medical opinion, typically once-a-week to avoid waste.
An LED flashlight
Yes and no. Torches are built into most things these days. USB batteries and phones most commonly. You’ll want a torch, but not just any torch. You will want a handcrank torch, because post-nuke there won’t be any power. The problem is… most electronics are likely to be fried by EMP, so you’ll want to store it in a faraday cage until the time comes. There are even some torches that have a solar/handcrank hybrid.
Battery-operated or hand-cranked AM/FM radio
Worthless and takes up weight. Post-nuke the decaying radioactive matter is likely to interfere with radios, and odds are the US government got nuked, so won’t be broadcasting anything helpful. If you desperately must have a radio, combine it with the handcranked torch, but we strongly advise against having a radio period (with the exception of a Citizens Band radio where you can actually broadcast for help).
Batteries and chargers
Pointless and pointless. The first one might not seem so, until you realise most things have been fried. Plug-in chargers will be very pointless, because the electrical grid will have absorbed most of the EMP damage with the transformers on the network burning out. Transformers take decades to replace. The power won’t be coming on any time soon.
A solar-powered/charged USB battery pack is the way to go. Usually you’ll want a foldable, multi-panel solar USB battery like this:
List of your medications and dosages (for everyone in your house)
Maybe. Who is going to fulfill the prescription order? China? Maybe stock up on medicine instead, and try to find alternatives.
First-aid kit
Acceptable, but expand it to include treatment options for radiation burns and poisoning… if you can find any.
Toiletries
You are not going to be worried about s**tting yourself if nukes fly. Use leaves. Ladies: Don’t re-use tampons, or reinfection risks occur. You might have to just let it ‘bleed out’. It is a post-nuclear war, after all.
Notepad and pen
Useless, who are you taking notes for?
Better to print out and laminate some bulletpoint, compact survival advice on cards and hand out to family members.
Another split moment…
Contact and meeting place for your household […]
When everything is covered in radioactive dust you won’t be meeting anyone anywhere, except underground. Find the nearest subway (no, not the sandwich store), work out the metrolines, and, hate to say it… also factor in the main sewer lines, too.
[…] and a regional map
Only sound advice so far. Might want to expand it to State/Country as well, major highways and all that, and include markers for resources, such as forested areas, sources of (relatively) pure water you can filter and drink. You’ll have to fill in the markers yourselves. Use red pen ink so it is easier to see at night.
Lightweight raingear or cover and a Mylar blanket
Eh, if you’re caught in radioactive rain you’re dead anyway. Mylar blanket might be useful, not sure how effective it is against a nuclear winter though when the world’s cold.
Items to comfort you in a stressful situation
No. Leave the comfort items. Use imagination instead. Comfort items are weight, weight makes heavy, heavy slows you down and makes you miserible. Besides, those monks look so happy without their worldly possessions. The walk and thought will do you a world of good (maybe reflect on what led to this situation in the first place).
If you have a disability or access and functional need, make a plan that will meet your needs.
Yes, but those co-dependent on the system will be most likely dead in the next few years. Can’t survive a dialysis machine with no electricity to run it.
An emergency health information card
Who is going to be alive to prescribe you anything? Where will the prescription drugs come from?
Supplies for your service animal
Leave the animals if you have to. It is insane they’re suggesting ‘service animals’ get protected. Some are necessary, sure, for blind people - but they can adapt to human hosts. Eventually, there won’t be enough to go around for everybody, and unfortunately, Ol Yeller gets it in the end.
Pets need Go Bags, too!
This entire section is a waste of time (especially the part of a ‘descriptor’). Maybe set your pet free and hope for the best. It’s a post-nuke scenario, where are you going to get chum dog food from? But extra hilarity credit goes to…
Copies of medical and vaccination records
Ah yes, you’re melting from the nuclear radiation, but better make sure you have your vaccination compliance documents for your pets handy. A real, good use of time.
The Daily Beagle’s Suggested Bug-Out-Bag
Ours is radically different.
High quality, compact (pocket size) water filter for plenty of water production
Dedicated rations that are calorific and nutritionally dense
A-Z multivitamins to make up nutrition shortfall (you don’t want scurvy), enough tablets for a year
Handcrank torch with optional solar (so it doesn’t run out of power)
Solar USB battery (so it doesn’t run out of power)
Warm clothes (for the cold)
Cool clothes (for the heat)
Extra medicines + find alternatives
Laminated survival cards loaded with survival advice for family members to follow
Map of the area with pre-scouted resource locations clearly marked on said map
Canteen (for holding water, food supplies in)
Optional but highly recommended: Geiger counter (so you can identify radioactive hotspots)
Optional but highly recommended: Flint and steel for starting fires with (you can also source a flint rock and some steel manually but it is easier to have to hand)
Optional but highly recommended: Tactical knife for cutting foilage, wood, etc
Optional but highly recommended: Tent to act as emergeny shelter
Optional but strongly advised: First aid kit with additional provisions for radiation (E.G. iodine drops/tablets)
Optional: Ghillie kettle for boiling water using sticks/wood
Optional: Compact emergency fishing kit
Optional: Rope/cord
Optional: Weapon for hunting (gun, bow, etc)
Optional: Portable CB radio to broadcast for help/communicate with others
Optional: Shelter building equipment (an axe for wood or a trunk handsaw)
You can probably think of other things to tack in, which depending on your situation, you likely should. You’d agree though, unlike ‘documents for the house’ most of the items on this list are essential or are at least very useful.
Firefighter Weighs In
As noted in the New York Post article above, a firefighter shared their view of what should be in a bag:
There are ways it overlaps, and other ways it differs. The important part is to get survival equipment that suits you and your specific threat model.
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